All bra bloggers and bra-fitting advocates, do you know this feeling: You've got a great friend. She is intelligent and nice looking but she doesn't care about her looks too much? Her favourite bra is Aah Bra and she hides her body in over sized clothes? I've got couple of girlfriends like this: one is 30years old, mum of 2 small boys and spends a lot of time training horses. She is so pretty and full of life. But I can't look at her boobs - she is a curvy lady with big bosom, I would say size 34hh. I don't know what size she wears - but her breasts are popping out of every bra and hang quite low.
My other friend is over 50 years old and she loves her Aah bras...I would say she may be similar size to me - but now her boobs look so sad. She just laughs at any of my "bra talks".
Another subject I've been thinking about - teenagers and bigger bust. My 14years old stepdaughter is very slim girl with bigger bust, I would say she is 28dd/30e. She was complaining about getting too much of unwanted attention. Mainly boys at school. Here comes horrible stereotype: girls with bigger boobs are easy. I remember something like this from my teens. Who teaches boys this crap? It's hard to be a teenager this days - girls at 14 talking about being sexy. 15years old boys looking for "friends with benefits".
So, back to bra subject: stepdaughter wears baggy tops and she doesnt' like to be a girl with biggest bust in the class. She was quite uncomfortable in cheap padded bras from supermarket. Size 12(34)c!!! Her mum won't think about getting a proper bra for her, so I took her to bra store. We managed to get 2 great bras by Gorgeous by Debenhams in 30e. She was so happy and told me she never was so comfortable in a bra before!
At least one successful story to share:)
My mum is like that, she is just convinced that bras are uncomfortable by design, so she doesn't wear a bra most of the time and it's not very flattering look. I tried, but then I realized that it's not worth it: she feels good about herself, she feels no discomfort, so what's the point? If she was bigger and had a discomfort from not wearing a bra or wearing wrong size she might be more willing to listen, but she is not.
ReplyDeleteI can go about bras and fitting for hours, I'm reading a ton of reviews and blogs, but she isn't interested at all, so I don't make her tired of these talks (well, I'm trying really hard). I accepted that we are different.
Well, I think that if it's not about helping unconscious victim of some horrible accident or heart attack or something like that the only thing we can do is to offer our help, but it's always decision of the other person if this person wants it. And it's fully applicable for bras and fitting even if it's sad to see sad boobs.
Thank you for comment. Good point - if somebody doesn't want it, you can't push too much. It looks like older women are harder to convince.
DeleteMy older friend would benefit so much from better bra, I'm still hoping she will let me to fit her. I think good bra and Tuba top from Urkye and she will look 10kg less and 10 years younger:)
BTW did you try a gift card for a bra good boutique? Trying on usually as convincing as one could get. I would try that myself, but locals are horrible ("ok, all 32Es you tried had wires too narrow for you, but you can get 38C and then alter the band" (c) )
DeleteI'm so glad that you were able to fit your step-daughter. Teens seem to be much more willing to try out new things than us adults who are stuck in our ways. Another reason bra fitting needs to be taught in health classes!
ReplyDeleteGood on you for helping your step-daughter! Getting a couple of good fitting bras and learning about how bras should fit at age 14 is a good start in her "bra life".
ReplyDeleteI only offer help when I feel it's wanted though. If someone is comfortable and happy with themselves and/or not too focused on their looks, who am I to say they should wear something more "flattering"? You say your friend could look 10 kg less and 10 years younger, but why should it be a goal for women in general to look slimmer and younger? I'm not telling you not to help her, especially since as an active lady, she could benefit from good supportive bras, but I do believe it's good to ponder if the people we want to help need that help at all.
Thank you, Astrid. I'm the last person to say that our goal should be too look younger or slimmer. I've mentioned bras to my friend because she was complaining about her weight and feeling a little bit down (she is going through a menopause).
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